Day 16: Motivation

First up - stats.  Weigh in done on Day 14, and a nice solid 7.8 pounds for week two with a total so far of 27.7 pounds!  Considering I wanted to lose 60-70 pounds in the entire six months I'm starting to feel pretty good about the numeric loss.  Which is good.  Very good.

Why? In 60 days I get to do my least favorite thing in the entire world.  That's right, I get to ride on an airplane.

This time I opted to give Frontier Airlines a shot due to schedule, and the fact that I can pay 15 bucks and get 5 glorious more inches of legroom.  But look at that poor fella's hips.  Yeah.  My ass is still a bit on the "mucho grande" size, and I'm hoping it still bleeds off over the coming two months.  I've flown a lot, and while I've not yet had a Kevin Smith incident, I don't plan to start now.  Enough said.

Over the past 5 days since I've updated things have continued to smooth out and become more and more routine. I won't use "easy", nor will anyone who has strictly adhered to Optifast will but I do don't intend anything other than a complete life change and reset.  Such isn't possible with compromise, mostly.  Aside from Optifast, water, and black coffee the only other substances to enter my body have been: (2) 8oz Diet 7ups, (1) 16oz Diet Pepsi, and Mrs Dash (makes the Optifast soup mucho grande).  That's all, in 16 days.

Even coffee I'm slowly dropping off.  I'm down to a single mug a day, and frankly I'm pretty sure I don't even "need" that.  I should probably drop it, but I'll keep tapering for now.  Next week I plan to try a single styrofoam cup per day.  We'll see what happens and the such.

Now for the good news!  This week I'm cleared to ride... my spin bike.. for two 30 minute sessions :).  Due to the low total amount of calories my body is consuming (960 total per day) the clinic has dictated very clearly that I need to start slow to avoid disaster.  I'll listen.

What an odd strange trip this has been so far, but a good trip.

Day 11: Late weights

Week one is now well in the books, done, and won. During said week I lost 19.5 pounds, which frankly makes me very very happy. While making me happy, it's also very secondary.

What I really accomplished is that I gained confidence, in volumes. I gained the confidence to overcome, to see, and to continue. Over the past two years I've been kicked in the gut, proverbially, by weight loss setbacks in so many forms that I needed something to push forward with - some win, even small. Prednisone and other prescription drugs threw me off during that time period, a throw off that I never saw an end to, until now.

I'm also learning. I'm taking inventory of every time I would have made a poor choice and it's really telling. As I told my wife, I'm not realizing how poor the choices I make are - not terrible, just poor. When waiting to long to get lunch and getting the kids something, I get myself something. That something is not a Big Mac with Fries and a Coke like the bad old days, but it is something like a taco salad, or a salad prepared in a manner that I'm not in control of.

Now I'm gaining the confidence to say "no" to that, and to realize in my head that hunger is just temporary, a signal not for panic but for information. Not for immediate "I HAVE TO GET IT FIXED NOW" but for "okay, make a plan, calm yourself, and do it".

With week one well in the books, Week two has been good. It's been 11 days since I've had anything but Optifast to eat, and the only drinks I've had are black french-pressed coffee, water, and a solitary Diet Pepsi that really tasted like crap. I'll stick with coffee, thankyouverymuch.

I have 73 more days to go until transition begins officially. In 52 days I head on a work trip to the west coast wherein I will not have a choice but to eat several times. I'm not worried, and will have a very direct plan in place of when it's necessary, what to have, and what to avoid. In other words: I will be a waiters worst nightmare :).

Good days are here, and ahead.

Day 5: Doctor Supervision Suggested

One of the more common questions I've had in the past, and am anticipating is simple: this seems pretty extreme, have you checked with your doctor? Is it safe?

Simply put: yes and yes.

In my case, in the next 6 months I'll see a doctor more than I have in the past six years. Weekly I go to the clinic to reload on Optifast and go through the "rounds". I get my blood drawn, which is then pretty extensively tested and monitored, then I meet with the doctor to address any issues I'm having physically or that the blood draws bring to light. Or, of course, my blood pressure and/or pulse rates during the time - which are also closely monitored (right now I'm at a 128/80 so not terrible).

My wife also is strictly watching her nutrition. She's also under close monitoring by her doctor due to thyroid issues. In fact, she's likely forgotten more about nutrition and physiology than I've ever learned. It's pretty cool.

During this time if anything is amiss - say I become anemic or have medical issues - I'll adjust accordingly. I don't expect it, but then again of course I'm 7 years older and you never know!

So, how is it going? I feel great, frankly. Sure I'm hungry regularly and often but that's to be expected with 960 calories spread out through the day. My energy levels are returning to a higher state after a tough day or two, but I do find that some really odd things happen if I do a lot. Like, a little delirium and dizziness happen on occasion without much notice. I've noticed this in the past when I've drastically lowered my caloric intake, so I'll give my body time to adjust.

I'm also finding serious power in resistance. Last time my temptations were minor, this time I'm surrounded by them - but ironically it's empowering.

More to come soon! Thanks for reading, my fans rock.

How it Works: Day 4

If you couldn't tell from the last post, I'm back on the Optifast 800 fast. What you can't tell is, well, everything else behind it. Some among you have been around since the beginning, but those who haven't - it's what started this blog almost seven years ago. If you couldn't tell from my early writings, a lot has changed since then. A world of difference. But now I'm back to where I'm started in a way, and that has leaves lots of questions to be answered.

What are you doing?

Putting it in it's most basic of terms, for the next 80 days my meals will consist either of liquid Optifast 800 or the optifast 800 "bars". We'll get to the quotes later, but essentially this is a fast that is controlled and medically supervised. Every week I go into a clinic and get my bloodwork done, meet with the doctor, meet with a nutrionist, and finally meet with a exercise/physiological expert.

This time it's 960 calories spread throughout the day, in 6 optifast "doses". Aside from that? Coffee, black, and water. Lots and lots of water.

Last time I allowed myself some veggies or zero/low calorie roughage after the first two weeks. This time, no. My only "solid" food are the Optifast bars and well, they really don't count. They aren't chocolate, or at least they are chocolate in about the sense that some days the sky could be considered blue. In - now 80 - days I'll be "transitioning" back slowly to food. Which I'm looking forward to being regimented as well.

Why are you doing this?

That's both rather easy and rather complicated. Reader's digest? I need a "reset", a win, and some forward momentum.

Complicated? 2011 was a trying year for me, coming off some medications that threw my metabolism into some sort of state I can't understand. Along with that, 2011 didn't hold much driving due to a lot of changes. Along the way I put on some pounds, about 60 in total, and to be honest that scared me. A lot.

So I was stuck in a spot where my fitness level had dropped significantly, where I wasn't getting much in the way of "wins" in the weight category, and where I was feeling pretty down on myself. I had contemplated doing this, if you remember in May of 2011, and at the time chose against it for a number of reasons. What I found is that again, no headway regardless of intake changes.

Things just happen, you know? My brother decided about three weeks to go on the Optifast diet, and that led to the question - would I do it again? I thought about it - a lot - and made the call two weeks ago. I was in. All in.

Isn't this going to be pretty hard with a family to take care of/jobs?

Nothing worth doing is easy. While it may seem on the face of things that having a family would make this harder, it actually helps a lot. Why?

First, my wife rocks (that links to her blog, which you should click on because there's great stuff there). After I made my decision, she made the decision that she was going to join me - but do it on her own. She knows more about nutrition than anybody else I know, and as such she's doing it on her own with her own formula of shakes. While she's not using the same formula or product that I am, she's doing the same thing. To say that it helps would be a gross understatement, rather it is one of the best things that anyone has ever done for me. I get choked up thinking about it, so I should stop there, but I am forever grateful for her unending support of me.

Second, my kids know what's going on, and they've got my back too. If you ever needed a reminder as to why you need to be healthy, look into their little eyes. Quickly you will find inspiration, and a reminder of why you are doing what you're doing.

Finally, I'm one of few who can count myself blessed to have co-workers that are not only that, but many who I would count as friends. Some were with me through the first round and supported me then, and the others who were not I know will help give support now. Or at least form a human shield in a month during the annual chili cookoff. I do know, however, that I have an award given to me by a man who I hold in the highest of respect that has been in a box for two years. I now feel worthy enough to put it back up on the wall again.

Aren't you going to be tempted?

Of course I am. And that's the point. It's the point of the mental victory of overcoming temptation in the most extreme of circumstances, and the power that gives you. It's the power I have after completing the GLGA, aka the most difficult day of my entire life. Which is to say after doing that, any bike ride is do-able. Kind of like the guy who actually climbs Everest, not one of those rich guys who hire a bunch of people to take them up Everest, but the guy who climbs it. After that every other mountain is possible.

I think that makes sense. Or at least it does to me, right now.

So yes I'll be tempted, a lot. Especially considering the regimen that I've given myself. The clinic does not particularly forbid diet soda and other calorie-free drinks, but I do. I'm sure Splenda and Truvia aren't necessarily off limits, but they are to me. And finally I'm sure nobody is going to yell at me for having a carrot or twenty, but I'll yell at myself.

It also helps that I really love good coffee, without additions, and am pretty darn good at brewing it.

In other words, I want to do this thing right, to the letter this time. It's like my obsession with running vanilla Android on my android phone, or not jailbreaking my iPhone, or like running the stock Chrome theme. You get the idea.

Is this another fad diet?

If it is, yeah no. You've got to either have a screw loose or be really dedicated to go without solid food and consume only stuff that really doesn't taste very good for 84 days by itself. I'm one or the other, maybe a lot of both. Ssh.

How does it end this time?

It doesn't. After this reboot if I lose the 60 pounds that's my (very reasonable and probably a lot too reasonable) goal my body will be back in shape for year round cycling without the issues that have presented themselves due to the excess weight and lack of fitness to compensate for it. And fitting in my winter clothes again comfortably will sure help.

So you, me, we're now in for a wild ride. I'm happy to report that I'm back, and plan to be here awhile. If you have any questions about this you can use the "contact me" in my blogger profile and shoot me an email. As I could say that I'd complain, but I won't. The support of my readers both regular and irregular, has been brilliant over the past 7 years.

Optifat is back

After much deliberation and, well, following my soul I'm starting another optifast liquid fast tomorrow morning. I keep falling and I need a chance to get back up an dust myself off. I need a win, a big win, or even just a little win. It's game three of the series and I need a win to put Hope back in sight.

My thoughts are all over the place on this right now so I won't even pretend to attempt to be concise.

I know now, more clearly than ever, that I can never live my life again this way. I know now I'm being given this second chance to reset, appreciate, and Move.

I don't know anything else besides that. Yet.